3 Texts to Graciously (but Firmly) Reject a Creepy Admirer

The thoughts and feelings that come with rejection are often very painful, and sadly most of us will have to deal with rejection at some point. For anyone, it can bring about feelings of unworthiness or inadequacy which is why when you’re the person doing the rejecting, you may feel intense guilt.

But when someone’s presence feels creepy, it’s best to sever ties and avoid any awkward situations in the future. Sometimes our intuition screams at us therefore if your admirer really makes you feel uncomfortable, it’s probably best to go ahead and respectfully let them know you aren’t interested.

Despite an overwhelming urge to shower fifty times after speaking to them, it’s best to let them down without being demeaning. You may be subject to name-calling by the other person, so be prepared for that. It’s okay to offer them friendship rather than harshly pushing them away, but you’ll need to be assertive in letting them know that’s just how far it can go.

The following templates are written to be both kind and clear by directly stating why you do not want to date them and act as a guide on how to tell your admirer that it won’t work in different situations. Without further ado, here are 3 text templates you can use to graciously (but firmly) reject a creepy admirer:

Pair of Hands Holding Smartphone or Mobile Phone With Chat or Messenger Application on Screen. Instant Messaging and Chatting, Online Communication

Text Message 1 | “I’m Too Busy for a Relationship With Anyone”

 

Hey [Insert Name],
I hope you’re well. Thank you for asking me out on a date the other day. At the moment I really want to concentrate on my studies and this is taking up all of my social time. I’m under so much pressure that I just don’t have time to date at the moment, and I’m afraid I would be no fun to be with.
You’re a good person with a lot of attractive qualities so I think you’ll definitely find someone else to spend time with.
[Your Name]

This template is ideal for anyone who is still in school or college and wants to give their full attention to their studies.

It can also be applied to circumstances where you’re taking a significant chunk of your time to undertake professional development qualifications or starting a business.

Even if that isn’t strictly true, you can use this template to reject a creepy admirer, because it’s so difficult to argue against. Who can challenge your statement that you are simply too busy to date anyone?

Illustrations courtesy of Shutterstock.

This article was originally published on https://www.nevertherightword.com. If this article appears on any other site other than https://www.nevertherightword.com without clear referencing it is a violation of the copyright owned by https://www.nevertherightword.com.

This article may contain affiliate links. That means if you click and buy a product, we may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. Never the Right Word is a participant in the Awin Affiliates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to participating merchants. For more information, please view our Privacy Policy and Earnings Disclosure page.

Incoming Call Concept Flat Tiny Person Vector Illustration. Hand Holding Phone to Pick Up Conversation. Mobile Screen With Male Contact Profile Avatar. Colleague or Boss Work or Private Communication.

Text Message 2 | “We Just Don’t Click”

 

Hi [Insert Name],
I wanted to let you know that I really enjoyed spending time with you yesterday, but I honestly don’t feel like we had a real connection.
I’m sure you must feel the same. I don’t want to waste your time, so I think it’s best if we don’t arrange to see each other again. I wish you all the best for the future, and hope you find someone that you really connect with.
[Your Name]

No one wants to find themselves in an awkward situation with a creepy admirer which is why many people have taken to ‘ghosting’. However, when you send a text or email that has a kind but precise message, you leave a better feeling for both of you.

We believe it’s kinder to be honest (without too much detail) than leave the other person wondering what they did wrong, or worse, thinking they’re still in with a chance.

It is always better to talk about yourself as the one with an issue, but by suggesting that the other person must have felt the same, you are implying that the feeling must be mutual as it was so obvious you couldn’t ignore it.

It would be difficult for anyone to come back to you after reading this message to ask for another date!

Egocentric Man, Narcissism Concept Illustration

Text Message 3 | “I See You as a Friend”

 

Dear [Insert Name],
I really enjoyed chatting with you the other day, and it would be great to do that again some time, just as friends. I think we’d make great friends over time, sharing stories of what we’ve been up to and who we are each dating.
I hope you’d like to be friends too, as we get on so well, in a platonic way.
[Your Name]

or…

Hi [Insert Name]
Thanks for the dinner invite, but I’m currently seeing someone and I don’t think they’ll appreciate me spending alone time with you.

or…

Hi [Insert Name]
Nice to hear from you again- I had a great time the other week with you but I have to be honest. I’m still in contact with my ex and I think there’s unfinished business and I shouldn’t be with anyone right now.
It wouldn’t be fair to keep seeing you and I wouldn’t blame you if you want to start dating someone else.

Again, honesty is key and it is always best to address the situation as soon as possible. Don’t assume that the other person will just read the signs. Be definite but kind. and if possible, extend a hand of friendship.

Remember to treat them as you would expect to be treated. Use kind words and give compliments like “You’re a good person.” This will make it easier for either of you to move on. Keep the situation private.

You don’t have to use social media platforms to let others know that you reject the admirer; this may cause them pain and embarrassment. If you have common friends, they do not have to know either.

A Woman and a Man Stand in Profile and Look in Their Phones

Remember to use “I” to let them know that it’s you and not them. Placing blame on the other person may make you appear arrogant, pompous, and discourteous.

However creepy the person may be, don’t knock their confidence, as they’ll need it when looking for someone new. It’s highly likely that we’ve all been repulsive to someone else at some point in time so it’s best to keep a bit of perspective and humility when dealing with these situations.

If their advances do not stop however, you’re probably going to have to take it up a notch. You’ll need to stop engaging in all personal conversations with them and keep your expressions neutral whilst interacting.

At Never the Right Word, our aim is to give you practical examples of how to handle life’s difficult conversations. If you have an awkward situation that you’d like example templates for, request a topic here.  

If you’re interested in further reading, we’ve also included links to our trusted resources and related posts below. To find out more about NTRW and our recommended tools, you can do that here.

Lastly, if you found this content helpful or want to share your own examples, let us know in the comments. We’d also be delighted if you shared this article and joined us on social media too!

Article by Never the Right Word

Scripts & Templates for Life’s Uncomfortable Conversations. Learn more about NTRW here. NTRW is supported by adverts and affiliate marketing links. For more info, please see our Earnings Disclosure.

This site does not constitute legal, mental, or medical health advice, please consult a competent licensed professional. If you have questions please Contact Us.

Never the Right Word

Never the Right Word

Hi there! I’m Amy, and I’m the person behind Never the Right Word. I’m a designer-by-day who’s fascinated by human psychology; you’ll find me learning about what makes others tick through all types of media and good old-fashioned conversation. Learn more about me here.

In 2019 Never the Right Word was born to fill the gap of ‘how-to’ websites with copy and paste examples showing you EXACTLY what you need to say to steer difficult conversations into positive outcomes.

Recent Articles...

Relevant Books We Recommend...

Words That Work

Words That Work: It's Not What You Say, It's What People Hear, is a behind-the-scenes glance at how the tactical use of words and phrases affects what people buy, who they vote for, and even what they believe. With discussion topics like The 10 Rules of Effective Language and 21 Words and Phrases for the 21st Century, author Frank Luntz demonstrates how selecting the right words is essential to getting what you really want. You'll need to use your new-found wisdom responsibly as Words that Work reads like a hands-on manual to improving communication in order to achieve specific aims in the worlds of business and politics. We found some of the proposed ideas highly effective- use with caution! Get your copy of Words That Work by CLICKING HERE.

Not Nice

Not Nice: Stop People Pleasing, Staying Silent, & Feeling Guilty... And Start Speaking Up, Saying No, Asking Boldly, And Unapologetically Being Yourself, world-renowned confidence expert, Dr. Aziz Gazipura, takes an incisive look at the concept of nice. Through his trademark style, Dr. Aziz uses engaging stories, humor, and disarming vulnerability to cut through people-pleasing conditioning and find the most authentic version of you. This book is for you if you want to discover how to easily say "no" to things when you need to or learn to confidently and effectively ask for what you want. You'll also be able to be more authentic in all of your relationships whilst eliminating any feelings of guilt and or fear about how others perceive you. CLICK HERE to get your copy of Not Nice.

If there was a book perfect to go alongside this website THIS would be it. In Delivering Bad News in Good Ways: Turn Difficult Conversations into Purposeful Dialogue,  author Alison H. Sigmon, M.Ed., PMP gives project managers a practical, easily applied method for quickly evaluating and effectively responding to the need to deliver unwelcome news appropriately. What we enjoyed most about this book was how each chapter begins with a relatable (and very often hilarious) real-life example with quotes, followed by a concise 3-step solution; Separate, Evaluate, and Deliver. CLICK HERE to get your copy.

The Science of Happily Ever After

In The Science of Happily Ever After: What Really Matters in the Quest for Enduring Love by acclaimed relationship psychologist Dr. Ty Tashiro the science behind how to choose a great mate to find enduring love is explored. Dr. Ty Tashiro's research pinpoints why our decision-making abilities seem to fail when it comes to choosing the right partner and how we can improve our decision-making skills. Dr. Tashiro has discovered that if you want a lifetime of happiness it all comes down to how you choose a partner in the first place- an insightful read for many. Get your copy of The Science of Happily Ever After by CLICKING HERE.

Pin Never the Right Word on Pinterest!

Check Out Our Recommended Resources.

Looking to become a digital publisher like us? We highly recommend these tried-and-tested tools:

We Recommend Elegant Themes

The Elegant Themes membership gives you complete access to 87 amazing themes and 3 awesome plugins, including Divi, the ultimate WordPress Theme and Visual Page builder. Elegant Themes have been building the world's most popular WordPress themes for the past 10 years, and rest assured their products will always be improved and maintained.

Divi WordPress Theme

Build Anything With Divi Theme

One of the most popular WordPress themes in the world. Building layouts is easy and fast, making it ideal to create mockups and wireframes, prototyping a design, and creating the website itself. Build from the frontend or backend. The builder is intuitive. It's easy to learn and can be used by non-developers to create amazing websites.

Divi Cake is a community driven marketplace for Divi Child Themes, Builder Layouts, and Plugins - Shop Now!

Customize With Divi Cake Plugins

Divi Cake’s main goal is to help the members of the Divi community find the perfect premium Divi themes, layouts, and plugins created by leading Divi developers and designers. Shop hundreds of premium Divi products like Divi child themes, Divi layouts, and Divi plugins on Divi Cake, the community-driven Divi Marketplace. Find out more about Divi Cake here.

We ❤️Shutterstock Media

We get our images from the OG in stock assets. Boost your business with the right images. They're royalty-free and ready to use. Footage & Music Libraries. 4k Images Added per Hour. No Daily Download Limit. Speedy Search & Discovery. With flexible plans and countless amounts of premium content uploaded weekly, we had to mention Shutterstock.

Skill-Up With LinkedIn Learning

When you want to enhance your professional skills with expert-led, online video tutorials, the only place to go is LinkedIn Learning (Lynda). With a subscription you get 24/7, unlimited access to over 13,000 business, design & tech online courses and with a free month. We like them because we get expert-led courses that we can access anytime, anywhere. What's not to love?

Web Hosting

Reliable Hosting With SiteGround

SiteGround boasts a whole list of fantastic features at amazingly affordable prices. Along with multiple growth options, free site transfers and domains, built-in Content Delivery Network integrations, WordPress support, AND human support we wouldn't go to anyone else. They're basically faster, safer, and more supportive- you can check them out here.

We Trust Grammarly Premium

Even seasoned writers need a helping hand at times, that’s why we trust Grammarly Premium. As the World's Most Accurate Online Grammar Checker, Grammarly Premium goes beyond grammar to help you ensure that everything you write is clear, engaging, and professional. Try Grammarly Premium’s AI-powered assistant here.

Find Graphics With Creative Market

Creative Market is the world’s marketplace for design. Bring your creative projects to life with ready-to-use design assets from independent creators around the world. We love the unique finds, social media templates, vectors you name it they have it. I also doesn't hurt that our founder has a little store on there...

Powered by Creative Market

Powered by Creative Market

Contact Us

Contact Form

Write to:
Never the Right Word
Building 19475
PO Box 6945
London
W1A 6US
United Kingdom

Follow NTRW

Support NTRW



Donating to Never the Right Word will
help us produce more free content. Thank you!

Stay in the Loop

Pin It on Pinterest