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Being blamed when things go wrong is not a pleasant place to be in, especially when things aren’t your fault. You can end up feeling ostracized or victimized and this can leave a sour taste in the mouth.<\/strong><\/p>\n
If you’ve ever placed the blame on the wrong person before you’re probably familiar with that guilty feeling you get in the pit of your stomach, especially if a dramatic conflict occurred.<\/p>\n
Rather than getting defensive, or (even worse) trying to cover up your mistake, it’s always good to make amends with the person you have incorrectly pointed the finger at.<\/p>\n
If you’ve ever blamed the wrong person these are the best steps you can take:<\/strong><\/p>\n
Be the first to admit your mistake; do not, by any means, deny or shift the blame; this will only compound the damage done. <\/span><\/p>\n
It’s important to acknowledge that when you apologize, you’re admitting that you engaged in behavior that’s unacceptable. Doing this will help you rebuild trust and restore relationships. <\/span><\/p>\n
Depending on the circumstances, it can also invite a broader conversation about acceptable standards.<\/span><\/p>\n
Accept full responsibility for the situation, and you will restore dignity to the person you hurt. This can begin the healing process and shut down any victim-blaming (by others or by the victim).<\/span><\/p>\n
Accepting your wrongdoing is a great start, but this means very little if the heart of your apology doesn’t express the thoughts, “I’m sorry, and I hope we can move past this.” <\/span><\/p>\n
A sincere apology demonstrates that you are taking responsibility for your behavior. This ultimately boosts your integrity, self-respect, and reliability. <\/span><\/p>\n
You’re likely to feel relief when you admit your mistake, and it’s one of the best ways to restore your character.<\/span><\/p>\n
While it’s essential to ask for forgiveness, keep in mind that the other person may not be ready to give you their mercy straight away. Give the person in question time, and don’t try to rush them. <\/span><\/p>\n
In the meantime, Think carefully about this step and what you can do that may be helpful. Token gestures or empty promises will do more harm than good. <\/span><\/p>\n
Similarly, don’t go overboard out of guilt. Find an appropriate way to make amends.<\/span><\/p>\n
So now you know all of this, now you need to figure out what you’re going to say. Don’t worry, we’ve got some suggestions for you below:<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/div>\n
[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_image src=”https:\/\/www.nevertherightword.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/speaking-online-never-right-word-scaled.jpg” admin_label=”Single Image” _builder_version=”4.4.8″ custom_css_main_element=”}||.wrapper {||position: relative;||height: 0;||\/* Formula is: (height \/ width * 100%) *\/||padding-top: calc(600 \/ 800 * 100%);||}||||.wrapper__img {||position: absolute;||top: 0;||left: 0;||max-width: 100%;||height: auto;” border_radii=”on|5px|5px|5px|5px” box_shadow_style=”preset3″ locked=”on”][\/et_pb_image][et_pb_divider _builder_version=”3.21.2″ locked=”on”][\/et_pb_divider][et_pb_text admin_label=”Template 1″ _builder_version=”4.9.4″ text_font=”Poppins||||||||” header_font=”||||||||” header_2_font=”||||||||” hover_enabled=”0″ header_2_font_size_tablet=”” header_2_font_size_phone=”26px” header_2_font_size_last_edited=”on|phone” locked=”on” sticky_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n
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If you find out you blamed the wrong person for something they didn\u2019t do, you owe them a big apology. It is better to do it as soon as you find out.<\/p>\n
Tell them you are truly and genuinely sorry and ask for their forgiveness. Tell them you were wrong in jumping to a conclusion as fast as you did without having all the facts and ask them what you can do to fix it.<\/p>\n
It is embarrassing for you but it is worse for them. Try to show empathy and put yourself in their shoes and you will understand how they would be feeling.<\/p>\n
Take this as a big lesson and make sure you have all the evidence and facts gathered before you accuse someone else again.<\/p>\n
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Illustrations courtesy of <\/i>Shutterstock<\/strong>.<\/i><\/span><\/a><\/p>\n
This article was originally published on <\/i>https:\/\/www.nevertherightword.com<\/i><\/span><\/a><\/strong>. If this article appears on any other site other than <\/i>https:\/\/www.nevertherightword.com<\/i><\/span><\/a><\/strong> without clear referencing it is a violation of the copyright owned by <\/i>https:\/\/www.nevertherightword.com<\/i><\/span><\/a><\/strong>.<\/i><\/p>\n
This article may contain affiliate links. That means if you click and buy a product, we may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. <\/span><\/em>Never the Right Word is a participant in the Awin Affiliates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to participating merchants.<\/span><\/em>\u00a0For more information, please view our <\/span><\/em>Privacy Policy and Earnings Disclosure page.<\/em><\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
It’s a natural human reaction to take credit for the positive things and blame others for the negative ones. Shifting the blame occurs mostly between couples, family members, and friends.<\/p>\n
Because we have close ties to them. It makes blame shifting easier. Sometimes we take them for granted and sometimes they do the same to us.<\/p>\n
For whatever reason, when you find yourself in an offensive mode, take time to re-evaluate the situation to make sure you are not projecting. Imagine a dynamic between a couple.<\/p>\n
One partner gets caught cheating. Instead of apologizing and admitting, they try to blame the person for not giving them enough attention, for not doing this or that.<\/p>\n
\u201cBecause you always treat me as such, I am not happy. It\u2019s your fault that this happened\u201d. That would be a terrible way to justify your actions.<\/p>\n
If you are in this situation and finding yourself blaming your partner for everything, it means you are denying to look deeper into yourself and dig the source of the problem out.<\/p>\n
Of course, some things don’t work out in a relationship. But it can’t simply be justified by putting all the weight on someone else’s shoulder because it takes two to tango.<\/p>\n
Even in a situation as serious as cheating, firstly you need to apologize for cheating and secondly, you need to acknowledge the fact that there were communication problems and you didn’t do enough to express the things that were bothering you.<\/p>\n
[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_image src=”https:\/\/www.nevertherightword.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/404-error-never-right-word-scaled.jpg” admin_label=”Single Image” _builder_version=”4.4.8″ custom_css_main_element=”}||.wrapper {||position: relative;||height: 0;||\/* Formula is: (height \/ width * 100%) *\/||padding-top: calc(580 \/ 800 * 100%);||}||||.wrapper__img {||position: absolute;||top: 0;||left: 0;||max-width: 100%;||height: auto;” border_radii=”on|5px|5px|5px|5px” box_shadow_style=”preset3″ locked=”on”][\/et_pb_image][et_pb_code admin_label=”Holding Yourself Accountable LinkedIn Learning Preview Video” _builder_version=”3.26.7″ text_orientation=”left” link_option_url=”https:\/\/linkedin-learning.pxf.io\/qvXo5″ link_option_url_new_window=”on” global_module=”10807″ saved_tabs=”all” locked=”on”]If you’re looking to develop your communication skills for professional environments even further, we think you\u2019ll like the following video course from LinkedIn Learning. Check out the preview below:
