[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ fullwidth=”on” admin_label=”Fullwidth Post Title Header” _builder_version=”4.9.4″ background_color=”#f7f7f7″ use_background_color_gradient=”on” background_color_gradient_start=”rgba(255,255,255,0.3)” background_color_gradient_end=”rgba(33,51,101,0)” parallax=”on” custom_margin=”0px||0px||false|false” custom_padding=”0px|0px|0px|0px|false|false” box_shadow_style=”preset3″ global_module=”767″ saved_tabs=”all” locked=”on” collapsed=”on”][et_pb_fullwidth_post_title author=”off” date=”off” comments=”off” featured_placement=”background” text_background=”on” text_bg_color=”rgba(255,255,255,0.5)” admin_label=”Fullwidth Post Title” _builder_version=”4.9.4″ title_font=”Playfair Display|900|||on||||” title_text_align=”center” title_text_color=”#213365″ title_font_size=”55px” meta_font=”Poppins|500|on||||||” meta_text_align=”center” meta_font_size=”14px” meta_letter_spacing=”2px” meta_line_height=”1.8em” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_gradient_direction=”245deg” custom_padding=”130px||250px|||” custom_padding_tablet=”150px||150px” custom_padding_phone=”50px||50px” custom_padding_last_edited=”on|desktop” title_font_size_tablet=”45px” title_font_size_phone=”40px” title_font_size_last_edited=”on|phone” border_radii=”on|5px|5px|5px|5px” border_width_all=”1px” border_color_all=”RGBA(0,0,0,0)” box_shadow_style=”preset3″ locked=”on”][\/et_pb_fullwidth_post_title][\/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ admin_label=”Post Content” _builder_version=”4.9.0″][et_pb_row column_structure=”3_4,1_4″ admin_label=”Post Content” _builder_version=”4.9.0″][et_pb_column type=”3_4″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text admin_label=”Introduction” _builder_version=”4.9.4″ text_font=”Poppins||||||||” hover_enabled=”0″ locked=”on” sticky_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n
Narcissists are difficult people to deal with. Changing the rules to suit their needs, fighting dirty, gaslighting, and manipulating people are all tactics employed by those with narcissistic personalities making life quite difficult for those around them.<\/p>\n
When toxic types can\u2019t control how you perceive yourself, they’ll likely try to control how others see you. They may publicly make false allegations where they can play the martyr meanwhile you\u2019re branded as a toxic person and outcast. A narcissist may go so far as to try to <\/span>launch a campaign to sabotage your reputation and slander your name so that you don\u2019t have a support network to fall back on.<\/p>\n
In order to mask their abusive behavior and tactics, the narcissist may use projection, blame-shifting, or gaslighting tactics and this may come in the form of a verbal attack- which is why you’re here.<\/b><\/p>\n
<\/b>Once you’ve let them know you’re not falling for their facade and you’ve identified their manipulation tactics- they may try to play the victim card. They’ll masquerade as the innocent party and shift the blame onto you perhaps even calling you crazy or toxic. You may end up apologizing for the things that you never said or did and they’ll play the bigger person who is in the position to forgive you.<\/p>\n
When this happens to you you need to protect yourself against their verbal abuse. Read on for: When a Narcissist Verbally Attacks You, Say These 5 Things…<\/strong><\/p>\n
Illustrations courtesy of Shutterstock<\/strong>.<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\nIf you go about life like everything is about you. You will be left with just you.<\/strong><\/h5>\n
I\u2019m sorry, I forgot I only exist when you want something.<\/strong><\/h5>\n
Thank you for reminding me about what kind of person you are. I had almost forgotten.<\/strong><\/h5>\n
Sorry my self-absorption got in the way of yours.<\/strong><\/h5>\n
Your problem is not knowing you\u2019re the problem.<\/strong><\/h5>\n<\/blockquote>\n
Probably not the most tension diffusing of tactics, but it will certainly feel good saying it! Be prepared to cut ties with this person and be prepared for some backlash.<\/p>\n
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Script 2 | “I Understand Your Perspective”<\/strong><\/h2>\n
<\/p>\n
\nHelp me to understand your point of view? Ahh I see- so what you’re saying is…[Insert relevant scenario].<\/strong><\/h5>\n
Forgive me I didn’t understand [Insert relevant scenario].<\/strong><\/h5>\n
You must have been very hurt by what I’ve done- I’m really sorry- I didn’t mean to do that.<\/strong><\/h5>\n<\/blockquote>\n
Whether you do or don’t isn’t relevant in this case, you’ll never win an argument with a narcissist who believes you’ve done something to hurt them. By saying “we” rather than “I” or “you,” you include yourself in the behavior.<\/p>\n
Resist the temptation to get defensive as it won’t help you in this case, you know who you are and your value so don’t bite the narcissist’s bait. There’s no chance of the narcissist admitting to any wrongdoing or apologizing, so this script is best used in situations where you aren’t yet able to cut yourself off from them (perhaps they are a relative or someone you work with).<\/p>\n
The narcissist will likely get angry at you because you’ve stood your ground so it’s better for everyone to end an unnecessary backward and forwards. You can play their game a little bit and split the blame between the two of you.<\/p>\n
[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_code admin_label=”Improving Your Conflict Competence LinkedIn Learning Preview Video” _builder_version=”3.26.7″ text_orientation=”left” link_option_url=”https:\/\/linkedin-learning.pxf.io\/Zzz2X” link_option_url_new_window=”on” global_module=”10711″ saved_tabs=”all” locked=”on”]If you want to develop your communication skills for professional environments even further, we think you\u2019ll like the “Improving Your Conflict Competence” video course from LinkedIn Learning. Check out the preview below:
